Why?

This had to be done... There aren't enough cynics around

Anjaan- Review

                A wise man once said that disappointment was the difference between expectation and reality... so we entered the cinemas with less expectation than an Indian cricket fan on day 3 of the ongoing test... Once Mukhesh died for the infinite-th  time, it was our turn.. The story is.... Hold on...  If you value time, we can cut to the chase, Villain Chennai vandha athu Basha, Hero Bombay pona athu Anjaan but the difference is that the director seems to have gotten lost in the decade... Hence the insipid result... For those who like the kaluvi vuthifying, please go on...

                The movie starts with our limping hero looking for his bro- Raju Bhai... We are warned by a coat wearing drunk oldie who blazes the screen with his performances... India has grown so much under the new reign that henchmen who don’t have enough to cut their ponytails wear Armani suits..   All these Tamil folks that go to Bombay seem to have nothing to do but kill people and become ‘dons’. Just imagine Saif in the slums of North Madras and our Pattasu Balus and Kokki Kumar conversing in pure Hindi because Natwarlal Anna is the biggest don in Royapuram... Can’t wait for that and him falling for a Fish selling damsel, played by Tamannah... Here, there is no back-story, but we assume C bhai and R bhai didn’t always wear designer clothes and sport ray ban glasses and drive ultra expensive cars...

                Why exactly Mumbai fears them is beyond me... they spend more time in malls and in bars and how the world takes a guy who dances with a gun seriously is beyond me... R falls for Sam in her most feminist role till date (seriously, none spared anything for her clothes, but she compensates with the fully clothed appearance towards the end) - as the daughter of a commissioner who disappears halfway into the movie. In the meantime, Manoj Bajpai looking like a P!^^p in Madmen is supposed to be a badass dude who is yet to realize that we are in the 2010s, pisses off our bhais... He gets molested and has his revenge in a betrayal twist which ultimately backfires on him- not as much as still having henchmen in coats attacking R bhai in a single file. After a series of punch dialogues and average stunt sequences and plenty of skin show, we have the villain killed (surprise!)

                Oh and by the way, did anyone else feel that there was slight undertone in the proceedings- much like the batman-robin dynamic in that awful movie starring Uma Thurman and the other chick? Sam asks our lead dude what he expected in the ideal ‘man’... Seriously, you don’t ask that question to a guy if you think he is straight and also there are plenty of unintentional innuendos, but for fear of offending our ultra conservative right wing friends, we stop this at topic here. We have Soori, Bramanandham, plenty of skimpily clad women- most of which makes no sense (except for the skimpily clad women because they are, well, skimpily clad)

                Santosh Sivan, Yuvan, Anthony and Lingusamy... Then you have Surya, Vidyut, Sam and Manoj and did I mention Sam? She shows more skin than Aamir in Dhoom 3... The movie isn’t totally awfully dreadful... Vidyut’s last lines and the interval fight sequence were actually quite decent... But when you have a weak script lasting 170 minutes with pointless songs and scenes, you are left with very little redeeming features...


                While drawing comparisons with Nayakan or Basha would be blasphemous, the closest we have to this movie is Thalaivaa and this flick edges ahead only because Sam doesn’t sport a cop dress. Seriously, all these new age bhais, take a cue (rather a break) - we grew watching Velu bhai and Baasha bhai... And with such big shoes to fill, shooting yourself in the foot aint gonna help... bang bang bang...

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2 comments:

bhuvanesh gopal said...

nalla kazhuvi uthifying

Sai Sriram said...

Ithu enna perumaiya..? Illa, Kadamai