This had to be done... There aren't enough cynics around

The Year That Was...

                It is time to do the unthinkable…  We are going to chronicle the major and not so major events of 2016. Why you ask, it was so spectacular for so many of us, well except if you were an immigrant in the USA (except the earliest colonizing immigrants) or a religious minority (anywhere in the world) or a woman (anywhere in the galaxy). But if you wanted to put it in a nutshell, 2016 was a challenging year for various reasons and was also like catching Hep C, you don’t know how you caught it (of course you do… that was when you were wefasdbgvcing Lizzie in the Wendy’s parking lot) and you are stuck with that bugger forever. So we start looking back at the year the term POTUS lost its sheen, ECMO became a household term and our dramatic overnight shift in interest from counting votes to counting notes.

                That reminds me of killer viruses, we had the Zika virus and I’m pretty sure you thought the year couldn’t get worse. Haw haw… Joke was on you. We had the crisis in Syria… Demonetization meant all our debit cards bounced and the government attempting to bowl a googly to outfox the corrupt ended up yorking itself. We lost gorillas, guerillas, singers, politicians, decency, trust and common sense (yeah USA, this one is for you). We learnt what ECMO was and I am dreading the day an old lady with kai kal kodachal asks for ekku-mo and I can’t even think about this ecmo implications on the Google grads who already want laparoscopic hemorrhoidectomy… (Laparoscopy involves looking inside your belly using a sophisticated set of instruments while you are under anesthesia and piles are tissues hanging down from your…)

                Coming to the world of art, where nothing is bad because it s art,  had the “pleasure” of reading a few really really really and I mean it, really really inspiring works of ‘art’. I wouldn’t say I enjoyed every one of those books… I was able to add to my Mean post collection (can be read here and here) and then I became a published author but the inner critic (Bald Shady says Hi) was not kind on my work and gave my submission for the anthology “Two Thumbs down because he had only two thumbs”. An elaborate review can be read here. We also critically analysed the literary masterpieces penned by our friends (here and here). Reading a few books was indeed a challenge and the final twist in these works felt like the “Mannequin Challenge”. And to them I say, Congratulations guys, you just invented the still photograph.

                My most recent read was a memoir dedicated to the legendary Professor N. Rangabhashyam and that shall not be analysed critically because although the book doesn’t entirely do justice to the Superstar in my field of specialty, that they even attempted the impossible so that the surgeon who was, is and shall forever be my hero, and his legacy would live on means I’m indebted just like the thousand other young surgeons who want to emulate him. And that brings me to the final part of this possible final post of 2016. After years of struggle and hundreds of sleepless nights and thousands of hours spent in the OT, I managed to clear my post graduation exam. Given the Trumpishness of the National Board of Examinations and the pass percentage that would put the percentage of tax payers in this nation to shame, that the examiners deemed me fit to join the legion of Surgeons means that despite all the shit the rest of the world went through, for me 2016 was spectacular.

                Finally, were approached by a famous person to be his biographer and he offered me Seven Thousand to make him look epic in the book. You see, if there is something you cannot but with a few thousand rupee notes, (remember, this was written 3 weeks before demonetization) it was my integrity. The Writer embodies the spirit of the society; he is the reflection of his time and as The Great Cato said, Delenda est Carthago (what relevance you ask, using Latin makes me sound like a well read and reliable author). Long story short, I sold my spirit for twelve thousand and a free surgery for two of my family members added to the original offer.

2017, here we come…

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